(Eng.) Piles of Regrets – Part 2

Author: Ssihobitt

Category: Romance, Chaptered

Main Cast: Han Sera & Cho Kyuhyun

Supporting Cast: Ok Taecyeon

A week has passed since Taecyeon and Sera are living together again. Nothing improved from the last time, Taecyeon would still come home very late at night in the hope Sera would already fall asleep so he didn’t have to be bothered by her silly effort to make up with him. Sera also has been busy tidying up her stuffs. No matter what happened with her alimony, she has no intention to live in this apartment, she already has a backup plan for herself.

Another reason she doesn’t want to stay in this place is because the memory it holds. This is their first apartment, the place has become a witness through their early happy marriage. Every corner of the house has a story to tell and this only makes her feel more suffocated to live in here. She doesn’t need to be reminded of how perfect her life was before the accident.

Sera was preparing another box to put her stuffs in when a book caught her eyes, it’s an old photo album they used to fill every time they found a picture worthy moment. She takes the album with her and decided to stop her activity altogether.

She opens the first page and she already feels the sadness strikes again. There it is, their first picture as couple. Sera was just graduating when she met Taecyeon, the picture shows clearly how innocent she was with her simple jeans and blouse compare to Taecyeon that certainly looks older and manly with his way to combined a white V-neck shirt with a fancy suit. They met in Ireland 4 years ago, Sera was celebrating her graduation by buying herself a tour package to Dublin and to her surprise she met another Korean in the tour named Ok Taecyeon. The sparks hit off like magic the first time they met. They both are spontaneous people and both are crazy enough to try new dangerous things such as sky jumping from a chartered plane, bungee jumping, they even ditch their tour to went on their little adventure themselves to get drunk in one of the famous Irish pub with the locals.

Sera knew from the very first time that her life won’t ever be boring if she’s with Taecyeon, he felt the same thing also. So he did a reckless proposal only a week after they met. The tour was showing them about the Claddagh ring which was the traditional ring that has been well known in Irish tradition. The tour guide was telling them the different meaning of each placement—on the right hand or the left, pointy heart pointing to the finger tips or towards the wrist—and by the end of the day, Taecyeon slips a Claddagh ring on Sera left hand with the point of the heart facing her fingertips. He just made her his fiancée and she cannot remember ever being so happy in her life before that day.

Han Sera digs deeper into her despair, she opens more of the pages and falls further into the sea of regrets. The wedding picture of them are now display in front of her, she remembered the first time Taecyeon introduce her to his parents. They were so afraid that their parent would object the reckless idea their children had. Lucky for them, after some background check on both families, both parents are agreeing on the marriage and proceed the ceremony only three months after they’re engaged.

Tears has fallen from her pretty face when she’s done turning every single page on the photo album. She hugs the album tightly close to her chest and cries even harder. If only she can share the pain with someone. If only spilling out everything won’t make matter worse, she really need some help but too afraid to ask too. Anyway, who’s in the right mind wants to help her? Those who were her friends already left, her husband clearly filed for divorce, even her parents are mad at her to the point they still refuse to answer her call. She left everything behind her a year ago. She just left. She has her own reason obviously, yet she chose to keep the reason of her departure a secret.

*

Taecyeon arrives after midnight. His trick to avoid Sera seems to work because Sera never bothered him anymore with useless gesture he dislikes. He goes straight to their room only to find his wife is not there, he knows he hates her but he doesn’t like the idea Sera is out there doing heaven only knows what. He walks towards the front door to check if her shoes are there to confirm her whereabouts. That’s when he accidentally takes a glimpse into their living room sofa. There she is, looks like she’s fallen asleep on the couch while waiting for him.

He approaches the couch and see his wife clearly now. She’s wearing her stripes pajamas while hugging something that looks like a book. His heart sinks a bit once he recognizes the book, it’s their photo album. Han Sera must have found it and spent the rest of the day looking into it.

His initial thought is to lift her up and put her on the bed, but then he remembers they’re not in the term of being romantic with each other. He’s been trying his best to ignore her for a week and he has to admit, it’s not an easy thing.

One of the reason it was hard for him of course because he still cares. He doesn’t want to admit this but he knows his heart still skip a beat when she greets him in the morning, he wavers a lot whenever she shows him a sign of weakness. However, he always tells himself the best mantra he has ‘she left you and she demanded a million US dollar up front from you, she acts innocent only to gain something’.

He tells himself that mantra again tonight, so instead of carrying her into their bedroom, he only throws blanket to cover her and tucks its corner into her body. He notices how much weigh his wife has lost since the last time they met, and tonight he also notices her legs swells up a little—doesn’t change her whole appearance but he still noticed.

Sometime he thinks his decision to divorce her was too harsh, maybe he should’ve asked her reason first. But then he remembered the sleepless night he spent without her, those nights when he mobilized his people to find a lead on his wife’s whereabouts.  Each night would have resulted in empty report until he got a clue from Sera’s credit card. The report told him that Han Sera is in New York, busy buying herself a bunch of designer bags that cost up to half a million US dollar. He blocked her access to the credit card and come to New York to pick up his wife based on the last hotel she swiped her credit card. She vanished and nobody knew where she went.

He was so close to give up and accept the fact that Sera left him forever for a reason he’d never knew, until she rang the doorbell a couple weeks ago. They were both took a long time to stare at each other, yet no one asked how they’ve been. Taecyeon let her in without asking any question, he secretly wished she would spill out everything—he gave her a chance to explain herself. Sera in the other hand, were glad Taecyeon didn’t bother to know what happened in the last year she’s been gone, she’s not ready to tell him, she’s still too devastated with her current condition that she wished no one asked her how she’s been.

The silent kept on going ever since that night and Taecyeon has lost his patience. He tried his last effort to scold her by giving out a divorce paper in the hope she’ll beg him to stay. But Sera won’t let her pride be reprimanded by her own husband, so she just agreed—with a condition that she wanted the both of them to stay together for a month before the final call.

He still doesn’t understand why she left, or why she bothers to return if she finally agreed to divorce, or why would she ask them to stay together for another month, or—the most bizarre one lately—she demands a million US dollar up front for her alimony. He believes what he wants to believe in and in this case he’s sure Sera has a change of heart and she only return for the money. With that thought in mind, he finds it easier to loathe her in the end.

*

Kyuhyun seems to be very determined to help Taecyeon knocks Sera down. He has been skipping his lunch time in order to help Taecyeon preparing for his own demands. They both were certainly laughed their ass out when Kyuhyun delivered Sera’s demand. Both Taecyeon and Kyuhyun thought how naïve Sera is to expect Taecyeon to grant her wish.

“You are now only a week away from the final divorce hearing Taecyeon-ssi, have you made your mind yet?” Cho Kyuhyun tries to sound calm in the hope Taecyeon will not catch a pressing tone in his voice.

“Of course I made up my mind. My wife will only get what I want to give to her. For a husband that’s been abandoned without any news, I already offered her a pretty good deal, don’t I”

“In my opinion, you’re being too generous.” Kyuhyun agrees.

“She’s been living too comfortable with me, Kyuhyun-ssi. I was taken for granted and now it’s time for me to show her what kind of power do I have.” Taecyeon eyes glisten with hatred whenever he talks about her.

“I’m checking her background though, she’s not poor so I honestly have no idea why she’s demanding so much. If she needs that much money she could’ve just ask her father.” Kyuhyun tries to lure Taecyeon to talk more about Sera.

“I’m confused about that myself Kyuhyun-ssi.”

Damn it, Kyuhyun’s effort to make him talk more doesn’t seem to work just yet. In his eyes, Taecyeon must be the perfect man for Sera, he’s tall figure perfected by a well-toned body muscle. He’s definitely good looking and Kyuhyun bet himself that after Taecyeon divorce is final, it won’t be too hard for him to find Sera’s replacement. What makes him even more perfect is his family background. Taecyeon is a chaebol from a multinational company that his grandfather built little by little right after the Korean war.

“So I’ll write this down: your will only willing to give her a million Korean won each month and she may stay in your current apartment, correct?” Kyuhyun gets his colored highlighter and mark his previous note.

Taecyeon nods.

“Do you also want a restraining order for her?”

“What? I can do that?”

“Well she hasn’t offended any of your agreement so it’s not very important at the moment, but you know, in the future the just-in-case scenario.” Kyuhyun cannot hide his mean smirk. He’s enjoying his job too much at the moment. He’s being paid to mess up the life of the woman that broke his heart. Moreover, he can use the term of ‘being professional on the job’ to make him sound less mean.

Taecyeon turn his working chair towards the window. He takes his time to think about this, he doesn’t think Sera would be so annoying that he’ll need a restraining order in the future. He doesn’t want her to be around him because that’ll only remind him of the pain she caused but he doesn’t have a heart to keep that much distance between them. He knows Sera well anyway, the woman puts her pride above everything so if he tells her once not to come closer, he knows she will obey.

“I don’t think I need to go that far, Kyuhyun-ssi. Instead can I just ask her not to see me for money matter?”

“Certainly, we can do that. Shall I write it down?”

Taecyeon nods again. “Ne, do you think the judge will grant all of our demands? “

“Well, the history here is quite clear, she left you, maxed out your credit cards, and she abandon her obligation as your wife. Even the judge will think what you give her is too much.”

Taecyeon turns his chair towards Kyuhyun, “I have to give her that much, I don’t want to see her suffer as well.” His anger towards his wife suddenly erased from his eyes.

“Excuse me to ask a personal question, Taecyeon-ssi. Do you still love her?” Kyuhyun cannot understand the man before him. if it was Kyuhyun that’s been abandoned, he’ll make Sera suffer for sure. He’s even trying to make her future life a living hell at the moment by provoking Taecyeon.

Taecyeon forces a smile on his face, “We went through some good time and some bad time as well. This is the worst time of all, but that doesn’t mean the best time weren’t there. I can’t ditch her into the dirt just like that as if my life with her has been a journey in hell.” He takes a deep breath before continuing. “I don’t know what kind of emotion or feeling I still have left for her, what I know is I’ll be hurt if she’s living a miserable life after we’re done.”

Kyuhyun feels like Taecyeon just thrown a bucket of cold water on his face. Sera has messed up with him big time, yet he still able to consider Sera’s feeling. He’s a little bit embarrassed by his own unhealthy obsession over Sera. In his head, Taecyeon has every right to scold her—but he chose not to do that. And here he is, just because he’s being heartbroken because Sera refused to go out with him and he’s trying so hard to break her life into pieces.

*

Han Sera has make sure that all of her stuffs are tidily packed for next week. Turns out her last effort to make peace with Taecyeon by living together for a month don’t bring out the result she wished to. In her mind, Taecyeon will soften up after a few weeks and finally forgive her. She knows she never really apologized for what she did, but in her defense Taecyeon really never gave her a chance to speak. He always gets home very late and leave as early as he could. Even when Sera tries her best to stay awake, the best reaction she gets from him is a blanket thrown upon her body.

Sera’s too busy checking her stuffs, she doesn’t notice her husband is in the same room as she is. She’s too accustomed of not having him around when the sun is still up. She literally jumps once she hears Taecyeon’s voice.

“Why are you packing?” His tone is bold.

Kamchagia!” She startled and jumps a little, if they’re not in the edge of their realationship, Taecyeon probably would have come nearer and teases her more for being too easily surprised.

He tries his best to maintain his straight face. With his eyes, he points the boxes Sera already prepared still demanding her answer.

“Those boxes are my stuffs.” She replies. Taecyeon can her a trembling sound in her voice. Is she scared of him?

“Why are you packing?”

Sera still looks surprised but she begins to regain her cool back. “Because I will only live here for another week.”

Taecyeon can almost hear a ‘click’ in his own head. He scoffs cynically before replying his wife. “Ya, I’m not giving you a million US dollar. There’s no way I’ll do that. So get your hope up high, all you’ll get is this place and monthly alimony.” He’s trying to sound as mean as he can.

“I know you won’t.”

“So, what’s with all these boxes?” He’s starting to lose his patience and walk towards the nearest box on his left. He lifts it up, open the top and turn it upside down to drop all its content.

Sera stands still in her place, she knows sooner or later Taecyeon would snap big time, and apparently today is the day. She chooses not to answer him and let him mess some more boxes she carefully packed.

“Aish jinjja Han Sera!” he kicks the box at the bottom to release his anger. “Stop putting up your act this instant! I won’t be fooled by you, wicked girl. Don’t even think you can go back here and get everything you want. I’m not a fool Han Sera, you came back only to gain alimony from me, didn’t you?”

Sera knew this is the first thought Taecyeon would have about her return. But she holds back whatever she feels in her heart and just let him be angry with her. This is her way to apologize to him, by letting him channel his anger right at her.

“SAY SOMETHING!” Taecyeon has lost his cool altogether. He can’t stand watching Sera looking scared while he’s yelling at her on top of his lungs.

Sera look down and takes several deep breaths before she answers him.

“Mianhe oppa.”

Taecyeon waits for her to continue, but minutes goes by without her saying anything else. He’s about to give up and turn around when suddenly Sera falls down on her knee. She hides her face from him, because she doesn’t want him to see her crying.

“I’m sorry for everything.” She starts to sob. “I’m sorry I lost our baby.”

Now Taecyeon feel like Sera just hit him in the gut. Is this what this is about?

“I’m not a fool not to notice oppa, how you’ve changed after the miscarriage. You came home later than usual, you came home drunk and I know I’m the source of your frustration. You hated me. You hated me for not being careful, you hated me for not obeying you, and after we lost the baby you just left.” Sera stills look down while pouring her hear out.

Taecyeon starts to feel the tears in his own eyes, is this what these all about? Because the miscarriage happened more than a year ago? He remembered he was devastated, yet he never—never—hated Sera for what happened. He avoided her simply because he felt guilty to be around her at that moment. He couldn’t stand to look at his wife after she suffers a lot from miscarriage.

“I’m sorry Taecyeon-ssi. I know my sin in your eyes are too huge to be forgiven, I never dared to apologize to you because I know how unforgivable it was. But I think this really will be our last days together and I just need to say I’m sorry. I’m sorry oppa.” She weeps her heart content she feels like almost half of her current burden has gone away as soon as she told him what’s been weighing her heart.

Taecyeon feels a lump forming in his throat, he can’t stand watching the woman he used to love kneeling in front of him, blaming herself for something that’s beyond her control. Naturally he would’ve hold Sera and calm her down. A voice from his deepest heart is telling him to call Kyuhyun to cancel the divorce hearing.

But he’s a man, he’s a man that uses his head to think before he listens to his heart. So instead of those heroic gesture, he chose to turn around and leave Han Sera wailing on her own despair.

*

Taecyeon and Sera are both on their bed and facing away from each other. She still embarrassed of the drama she causes earlier this afternoon and Taecyeon knows he couldn’t resist not to hold her if he looks at her face at this moment. He’s having an emotional battle in his heart at the moment, he wants to tell her that it’s not her fault that they both lost their baby but at the same time he doesn’t want Sera to get her hope high by thinking if he forgives her then their problems would disappear.

“Oppa.” Sera braces herself to speak up, “Are you asleep yet?”

Taecyeon’s heart skips a beat, he didn’t thought Sera would still want to talk to him after he gave her his cold shoulder.

“Not yet.”

She sits up and rest her back on the head board, Taecyeon hears this and follow her to sit up also.

“Oppa, I know we signed a deal about living together for a month before I sign the divorce paper.” She takes a deep breath, thinking weather it’s wise to ask him the biggest favor she could ask considering their condition. “I know you won’t grant my ridiculous demand, but I’m moving out from here still. I can’t stay here. There’re too much memories here and it’s too much for me to be alone surrounded only by those memories.”

“Shall I get you another place?” He confuses himself by being so generous.

Sera draws a weak smile on her face, “No, thank you, but you don’t have to. I already got a place for myself.”

“Does the place costs a million US dollar? Is that why you want that much money?”

She can’t help not to laughs a little by his spontaneous words. “No, that’s not what I’m asking it for.” She finally allows herself to look at her husband. He’s looking at her too, they take their moment to reminisce whatever adoration they have for each other in their own heart.

“Help me to understand then, why would you need that much money. Do you owe money to a debt collector?”

“I’m not. Forget about my demand oppa. I know that’s ridiculous.” She lifts both of her shoulders as if she really doesn’t need the money. The exact opposite of the truth. “Instead of that, I’d like to ask you for something bigger.”

He rolls his eyes and curse himself to let his guard down. He should’ve know Han Sera won’t give up just like that.

“I want a full day with you.”

Taecyeon stops his own cynical thinking in his head and pays more attention to her. “What?”

“I want you to take me on a date, on our last day together. If it’s not too much to ask, please allow me to jump into a time machine that’ll take us back to the moment when we were crazy about each other.” She tries so hard not to shed a tear, but a warm liquid has fallen from her pretty eyes. “Please allow me to say a proper goodbye. Just for a day, let’s treat each other as if we’re in love.”

Taecyeon fights all kind of rush that gets into him. He doesn’t understand what she’s saying. Did Han Sera just thrown out all her alimony for a day of romantic date with him? what is going on in her mind, really? He stares at her in disbelieve.

“Is it impossible also?” another tear falls down. “I don’t want the money oppa, I just want to spend one last day with you. Please..”

“Okay, let’s do it.” His mouth says the words without him even thinking about it.

“Ne?”

“Let’s do it, let’s go on a date.” Without his command, his hand already touches her face and he wipes her weepy cheek with his thumb. “Let’s end it on a good term.”

Sera feels like the weight in her heart has been lift up. Did Taecyeon just agreed to her silly idea? Is this his hand on her face caressing her tenderly? She’s believes she’s dreaming and if she is, she doesn’t want to wake up. She wants to be in his embrace until the end of her time.

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6 thoughts on “(Eng.) Piles of Regrets – Part 2

  1. Seo HaYeon says:

    really! I don’t know exactly who is the man main character here_ Kyu or Taec?? I have an anonymious feeling that beats my heart! what happened Sera?? okay it just second part but it makes me feel like the conflict seems in middle part wkkk… Okay I’ll waiting for this more passionately ehheee_ 🙂

    Like

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